Ultimate ex love song

Horizontal

For those people who get to wake up Monday-Friday to their alarm clock and head to work I consider lucky. But those who have to do it envy my current lifestyle of staying at home all day in the horizontal position. It's been two weeks since I've been not working and I'm about to have a mental break down. I can't handle these lazy days full of tanning, working out twice a day, going on beach cruises through the circle, tumblring all day, and opening the fridge about 15 times a day to see if anything magically yummy appeared. I just re-read that sentence, and hot damn maybe I do have it made. Maybe if being a stay at home mom was my ultimate goal in life. The past 4 years of my life have always been on the go and never a dull moment, I think its my lifestyle is rejecting these dull moments and creating myself to freak out. Maybe its just a natural life after graduation freak out. Whatever it is, I know I need and want to start working asap. And a soon as that happens if it's not something I'm passionate about I'm gonna wish I was in my horizontal position being a waste of space. I'm wanting this next chapter in my life to start, but don't know where to start.

Middle

The middle of the week, the middle of the month of July, and the middle of a breaking point in my so called circling reoccurring thought process. Fresh out of college with a degree in Communications that I hold to my own degree of a big pat on the back. Good-job Candace, but what's next? There's always the question of what's next after a big accomplishment. I've been going to school since I've been 5 years-old. Of course it's only natural to feel out of my comfort zone of what to do with the rest of my life. Go back to school? no, so over spending money on that. Although I do appreciate and love education. Get a 9-5 job that pays the bills just to ease my mind for the mean time? Nope, I know I can picture myself 6 months from now bored and pissed at myself. Or go big, and start my adventure in one of my life long goals. Travel, Write, and get paid to do both. The only thing that's stopping me is one of the most common emotions around the world, FEAR. Fear of not being good enough, fear of being made fun of, fear of not being able to achieve my long term goals. I'm beginning to map out in my head what I really want to do career wise the rest of my life, but my hardest part is getting started. Isn't that always the hardest part though?